By Shenelle – It’s Been a Journey Podcast
Some stories are too powerful to stay hidden. They demand to be told—not to sensationalize pain—but to give hope, bring awareness, and break chains. This week on It’s Been a Journey, I had the honor of sitting down with Apostle Dezra Hines, a woman whose testimony will challenge what you think you know about “holiness” and open your eyes to the devastating reality of spiritual abuse and religious control.
Apostle Hines’ journey began with a hunger for God—like so many of us. But that desire for truth led her into the arms of a place she thought was holy… only to find herself in a cult disguised as a church. She was pressured into an arranged marriage, manipulated through twisted interpretations of Scripture, and told that staying—no matter the abuse—was “God’s will.”
This is not just a story about church hurt.
It’s about the dangers of blind trust, the courage to question, and the freedom that comes when you finally see God for who He truly is.
What Led Her There
Before joining the church, Apostle Hines was searching for belonging, guidance, and a deeper spiritual connection. Like many who find themselves in controlling religious environments, she didn’t know that her lack of biblical knowledge made her vulnerable to manipulation. Leaders used her desire to please God as a tool to trap her in an environment where their word carried more weight than God’s Word.
Life Inside the Cult
The church environment was built on fear, not freedom. Members were expected to follow strict, man-made rules. Spiritual language masked control tactics. Public shaming was disguised as “correction.” And questioning leadership was seen as rebellion against God Himself.
Apostle Hines recalls being given into an arranged marriage—not out of love, but out of religious obligation. What followed was domestic abuse, emotional isolation, and a constant pressure to submit, no matter the cost to her safety or mental health.
The Moment of Awakening
There came a time when she could no longer reconcile the God of love she read about in Scripture with the controlling, abusive version of God that was preached to her. “Fear is not of God,” she told me. “Confusion is not of God. Abuse is not of God. I had to decide whose voice I was going to follow—man’s or God’s.”
Her escape was not easy. Leaving a cult often means losing your entire community. But Apostle Hines chose truth over comfort, freedom over fear, and the living God over false representation.
Life After Freedom
Today, Apostle Dezra Hines uses her platform to help others recognize spiritual abuse and religious trauma, and to teach the difference between God’s truth and man’s control. She preaches a Gospel that heals, restores, and liberates—reminding survivors that God was never the abuser.
Reflection Questions for Readers
If you’re reading this and wondering if you—or someone you love—might be in a similar situation, here are a few questions to consider:
- Do you feel afraid of your church leadership rather than loved and supported by them?
- Are you discouraged from reading or interpreting the Bible for yourself?
- Is questioning leadership treated as rebellion against God?
- Are you pressured to stay in harmful or abusive situations because it’s “God’s will”?
- Do you feel controlled rather than guided in your walk with God?
If you answered “yes” to more than one of these questions, it may be time to seek counsel from a trusted, biblically sound, and safe spiritual leader outside of your current environment.
Cause and Effect of Spiritual Abuse
Cause: Misuse of Scripture, authoritarian leadership, fear-based teachings, and isolation from outside voices.
Effect: Loss of personal identity, distorted view of God, emotional and spiritual trauma, and in some cases, physical danger.
Resolution: Healing begins with truth—knowing God’s Word for yourself, seeking safe and healthy spiritual guidance, finding therapy or support groups, and allowing time for God to restore your confidence in Him and in yourself.
Final Thoughts from Apostle Hines
“You can survive, and you can thrive. What man used to break me, God used to make me. I am proof that freedom in Christ is possible, no matter how deep the deception ran.”
Watch Full Conversation https://www.youtube.com/live/hS4hKLu6TeU?si=BNbTcFl9IifZE7vTHere
If Apostle Dezra Hines’ testimony has spoken to your heart, I encourage you to share this post. Someone in your circle might be silently living this reality right now. You can also listen to the full conversation on It’s Been a Journey Podcast on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and YouTube.
Follow us on Instagram and Facebook @ItsBeenAJourneyPodcast, and let’s keep the conversation going.
Because healing begins when we stop suffering in silence.